Getting approach anxiety,  feeling anxious about approaching a woman you are attracted to is normal.  It happens all of the time.  What you should know is that it is possible to get over it to enough of an extent that it doesn't have to be much of an obstacle that you have to deal with anymore.  For any guy who has had to deal with approach anxiety - it can be a hard thing to try to cope with.  One thing that you should be realistic about,  though,  is the fact that it almost never goes away completely.  You are always going to have situations that make you feel a little bit anxious about approaching a woman.  What I would hate to see,  though,  is a guy avoiding chances to talk to women because his approach anxiety ends up getting the best of him.

Here is a video that deals with anxiety that I think is good,  even though it isn't exactly about approach anxiety,  it still is worth watching and can be quite helpful:

One thing that definitely helps when it comes to dealing with approach anxiety is to make the "problem" seem smaller by not putting as much weight on the fact that you are really hoping to make a good impression.  Think about it in the context of going for a job interview,  for example.  If there is a job that you are really hoping to get,  then you are going to feel more anxious in that interview than you would for a job that you really don't care if you get or not.  The same can be said about approaching women a lot of the time.  If you think about it,  you probably don't get as much anxiety about approaching a woman you are not that attracted to,  right?  Part of the reason for that is because you don't care about any outcome,  you are not trying to attract that woman.  If you were trying to attract her,  then you probably would be feeling some anxiety.

So,  if you can "trick" your mind into feeling like you don't care what the outcome is,  a lot of the time you will find that most or all of the anxiety that you feel about approaching a woman will go away.  Another thing that works,  and this is something that really does help a lot,  is to become a little more casual when approaching women.  The less you are trying to come across as smooth,  the less you are trying hard to be seen as the coolest guy in the room,  the easier it is to just go ahead and make conversation.  And that nonchalant approach tends to work out better for most guys than trying too hard to come across as cool does.

That may go against the grain of what a lot of PUA style coaches try to teach,  but you know what,  who cares?  It's more about what actually works for most guys in most situations,  right?  If you want to get a little more advice from someone that I highly recommend,  then I would say that you want to check out any articles by Wayne Elise on Psychology Today.  Here is one that refers to approach anxiety that is pretty good in my opinion:  http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/art-charisma/200804/how-deal-approach-anxiety

Hands down,  you can learn more from him when it comes to approach anxiety and making GOOD conversation with women than you would from most self proclaimed pick up artists out there.  If you prefer video,  then this is a good one by Wayne Elise about talking to women:

I actually don't have a lot to say today,  but I did come across an article on Psychology Today that is worth a read.  It's from a clinical psychologist,  so if you are one of those guys who really wants to get a clinical look at what a woman might find attractive,  it's worth checking out.  Having a glance,  I'd say that there are some things that I agree with and some that don't seem to ring so true to me as far as my experience with women goes.  Still,  it's worth a look,  so here it is: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/head-games/201303/what-women-find-sexy

Most guys who get into the idea of learning how to attract and seduce women seem to only want to get their information from guys and mostly from guys with no psychology background and no clinical background.  I think that is okay,  but I also think that you should check out what women have to say about attraction,  they aren't all oblivious to what is going on when they are attracted to a man.  And to get some advice or some insight from research can be good,  though you do have to be careful because some of the time,  the way that they set the research up is too clinical and not at all like what happens in the real world.

I've seen lots of things when it comes to the pick up and seduction game.  And one thing that I have always noticed is that the ones who try to play the game the hardest,  don't usually do quite as well as the ones who know how to just go with the flow.  Here is what I mean:  A guy memorizes some kind of a routine or script that he learns and so he goes out into the field,  expecting to be able to execute the routine or script flawlessly and end up having a pretty fun night.  

So,  he goes and he approaches a woman and that women does something he doesn't expect - she gives him other answers than what the routine or script works off of.  And that throws his game off completely and he totally loses on that opportunity.  It's okay to rely on a routine or a script if that is what you need to do,  especially at first.  But,  you have to learn to be flexible.

That's really what I mean when I say that you don't want to play the game so hard.

You don't want to become so rigid in following some kind of routine that you can't play off of what is naturally happening. I've seen guys get obvious indicators of interest from women,  all of the signs that they need to see to know that the woman likes them.  But,  because she isn't playing off a routine,  the guy backs off and assumes that he had no chance.

When you do that,  you lose that opportunity but you also lose something bigger than that.  You lose the chance to find out if you can play in the field without any routines.  That is how you become a natural.  That is how you are going to become that guy who can make a woman feel attracted to him in a matter of moments.

If you have never seen Mandie Sue before from Playboy's Cyber Girls,  she is definitely a lovely lady to look at.  I don't want to embed the video here,  so I found a cool site to look at that is PG-13 ish.

Check it out:  Mandie Sue Video

One thing that always comes to mind when you see a woman like this is,  they are everywhere.  Before she was discovered,  she was just a woman in a town or city somewhere and there were guys who wanted to approach her but didn't.  Well,  are you going to be like those guys,  or are you going to unleash your inner bad boy and actually learn how to approach a woman like that?

Because,  when she becomes famous and athletes and celebrities become the guys she can get - you might lose your opportunity.  Think about that the next time you are in a club and you see an attractive woman walk in.  She might just become the next Mandie Sue.

Here is one of the main problems that you get with conventional dating wisdom.  It's based on what tends to be politically correct advice,  stuff that is safe to say,  but not necessarily stuff that is really all that effective.  Case in point,  the idea that a guy should try to be friends first with a woman.  Sounds great in theory.  Sounds like the way that it "ought" to be,  right.

Okay,  go ahead and ask 10 random guys in their twenties about the realities of friends first.  Probably 7 or 8 out of those 10 are going to have one of those stories about being in love with a woman friend and it leading nowhere at all,  except for friendship.  Now,  friendship is not a bad thing.  It's GOOD to be friends with women.  It's not always good nor healthy to try to be friends with a woman you would rather be dating.

That can lead to a whole lot of emotional turmoil.

Here are some reasons why you can't be concerned with trying to be friends first with a woman:

1.  If you are her friend - what do you think she is going to talk about with you?  Eventually she is going to be talking about the guys she likes,  the guys she has dated,  stuff like that.  Do you want to hear that ... for real?  If you are shaking your head NO,  then you know that being her friend and hearing that is not going to be fun.  

2.  Friends first is not a promise to date later on.  She is not promising that at some later date she will date you if she is your friend.  Not by a long shot.  Really,  she is saying that she likes you just not in that way.  Problem is,  "that way" is exactly the way that you want her to like you.

3.  Finally,  friends first is the kind of thing that you hear because it sounds like a safe answer to give out.  It's not socially as acceptable for someone to tell a guy - you need to escalate quickly with her to avoid the friend zone.  Yet,  that is really the kind of advice that you need to hear if you want to avoid the friend zone with a woman at all costs.

Sometimes it can feel like you have to be an expert in female psychology to do well with women.  Just when you think you know what is going on and what you need to do to make a woman like you,  you'll have one of those experiences that just proves that you don't know as much as you thought you did.  It would be nice to feel like you know a few female psychology secrets that other guys don't,  so that you don't have to go through those kinds of experiences and so that you can do better with women than most average guys do.

These 3 female psychology secrets to attract women are going to help you attract women right away:


1.  Women say that they want to meet a guy who is nice and polite,   but if you don't show a woman that you have the balls to approach her,  it doesn't matter how nice and polite you are.

This is one of those "secrets" that some guys do eventually come to know and when they do,  they wish that they could go back and tell themselves not to try to be one of those nice and polite guys who never really ever approaches women.  Look,  it's not a bad thing to be a nice guy and I am not saying that you have to turn into an a******e to attract a woman.  However,  if you don't have the balls to approach a woman,  don't expect her to be turned on and attracted to you.

2.  A woman will be much more likely to be turned on by you if you are able to make her feel secure around you.

Being able to make a woman feel like she is totally secure and safe when she is around you is a big deal.  It's one of the reasons why women tend to be attracted to men who look like they can protect a woman.  You don't have to be a body builder to give a woman the sense that you can protect her and make her feel secure.  One of the things that you can do is to show her that you are calm in just about any situation and she'll feed off of that vibe and feel a sense of security and safety.

3.  If you can get a woman to commit to competing with another woman for your affection,  you'll end up having a chance to be with her easily.

This is one of those things that most guys never learn because no one really tells you that this works.  Women won't because they are not aware of the fact that they do this or they just don't want to admit it.  Men don't because the ones that do know that this works know just how well it does and it becomes one of those female psychology secrets that they don't want to share with others.  Being able to make a woman feel like she has to compete with another and make her feel attracted to you enough that she commits to competing with that women is one of the easiest ways to end up hooking up with her.

You've gotten her phone number and it is clear that she is definitely attracted to you and you like that.  However,  the doubts start to creep in,  the low expectations start to come back and now,  you are wondering whether or not you are really going to be able to make her want you.  If there was one thing that bad boys who attract women easily know,  it's that you can't make things harder on yourself than they already are.  When you overthink things to the point where you start to second guess your successes... you are setting yourself up for eventual failure.

All you have to do is to stop making it so hard on yourself and just let it happen.

Once you have already gotten her phone number and you know that she is attracted to you,  all you have to do is BUILD on that attraction.  When you start to get pessimistic and you start to worry about losing her attraction,  that is when you are going to eventually lose that attraction that she feels.  You don't want to lose that attraction,  so DON'T.

Stop overthinking things and just let it be.

Call her up.  Have some fun.  Get a date with her and then work on wowing her and making her feel like her attraction for you is growing.  Don't start thinking that she is going to change her mind or that you are going to end up messing things up.  You won't if you are relaxed and having a good time.  You will if you start to overthink things and you start to allow your doubts and your worries creep in and confuse you and make you feel like you don't know what you are doing.

I know that deep down inside,  you are more than just a little bit curious about what it might be like if you were actually good at seducing women.  Sure,  there might be a part of you that seems to be skeptical about whether or not you have the skills to try and seduce a woman,  but you have to admit that it would be a lot of fun if you knew how to approach a woman and make her feel like she is totally attracted to you.

Here are 3 seduction tips that just can't be ignored if you want to get good at seducing women:


1.  You have to become a master at approaching women with confidence.

Don't feel like you have the confidence to approach a woman?  Well,  then you are going to have to build confidence with women because without it,  you really don't stand much of a chance.  Now,  just feeling confident is not enough to make women suddenly feel hot for you,  but not having any confidence around women is a sure way to end up losing any chance that you might have had of being able to hook up with her.

2.  Women want to be around guys who know how to have fun,  not guys who complain all of the time.

I used to hang out with this one guy once in a while and he was really bad when it came to women.  And while he would come up with all of these excuses for why that was,  most of the time it came down to the fact that he just wasn't that fun to be around.  So,  even if he did meet a woman,  she'd want to bail after talking to him for a few minutes because he was always finding something to complain about.

3.  Knowing what it takes to make a woman feel sexually attracted to you makes all of the difference.

What makes the difference between a guy who is good at being friends with women versus a guy who is really good at ending up in bed with women?  The ones that know how to get a woman into bed are able to make a woman feel sexually attracted to them.  If you can make a woman feel like she is really attracted to you on a sexually level,  seducing a woman isn't that difficult at all.

Do you really want to become more of a bad boy when it comes to getting women?  If so,  then you might want to ditch those dating rules for men that every dude seems to want to follow and become a rule breaker this year.  You don't want to have anything hold you back from having success with women,  and one thing that will definitely hold you back is if you pass up making the move on a woman you like all because you are trying to blindly follow some rules on dating that you think you are supposed to follow.

They are only guidelines anyway.

If you study human behavior in any regard,  then you should know that there are no absolutes.  Since dating is all about human behavior and the interactions between men and women,  there are no absolutes in this arena,  either.  So,  if there is one resolution that you should make this year -  it is to STOP following the rules if they seem to get in the way of your success with women.

Of course,  you should have OTHER goals or resolutions as well.

You don't want to become so one dimensional that all you think about is how to get better with women.  The funny thing about it is,  if you do become one of those guys who only thinks about getting better with women -  you'll probably get worse because being one dimensional like that just isn't all that attractive.  It doesn't give you much to talk about,  either.

Set some goals or some resolutions,  just make sure that one of them is to become a rule breaker of sorts if you want to genuinely enjoy being a bad boy.

So,  you have a girlfriend who is good to you and even though you are a little bit of a bad boy,  you still want to do a good thing and get her a gift.  Nothing wrong with that.

Here are a few ideas that might help you out:

1.  Sexy lingerie.

Nothing is better than buying your girlfriend a gift that she is going to like... and you are going to enjoy as well.  Grabbing a little sexy lingerie to give your girlfriend as a gift is always a good way to go.  Check out Victoria's Secret and get some help from one of the clerks if you want to know what will be a "classy" piece of lingerie to give to your girlfriend.

2.  Champagne or wine.

If she likes to drink either,  giving her a good bottle of the white or the red or even the bubbly is always a good idea.  Best part is... it's another gift that you are going to get to enjoy as well.  Plus,  it can set the mood for an overall romantic night,  so it can be a catalyst for some other fun as well.

3.  Take her to a concert.

It's always a good thing to make your girlfriend happy and one thing that will definitely make her joyful is scoring some tickets to a concert that you know she is going to enjoy.  Even if it happens to be a group that you don't like,  go ahead and do it.  She will thank you later.  And I do mean "thank" you.