LOL,  you definitely don't want women to see you do this...

Definitely don't be the guy  wearing too much cologne,  either.

There is one thing that I have seen time and time again prove to be effective if you really want to get over your insecurities around women and that is... IMMERSE YOURSELF in what makes you insecure.  Now,  I wouldn't do this all at once,  that can end up proving to be a little bit too much.  However,  if you think that you are going to somehow get over your insecurities around women by avoiding women... it's just not going to happen.

MAKE ONE APPROACH PER DAY -

This is an exercise that can seem kind of daunting at first,  but it can end up proving to really help you feel totally secure and confident around women.  Make one approach per day.  In 30 days,  that will mean that you have now approached 30 women.  Most guys don't talk to 30 women in 30 days,  so you'll have the leg up when it comes to experience.  What you should find,  though,  is that it starts to not just get easier to approach a woman,  but also that it gets FUN.

You might even find that you want to make more than just one approach per day and that's fine.

If you are a sports guy like I am,  then you know that the guy that makes the game winning shot doesn't just take that one shot and watch it go in,  right?  He takes thousands and thousands of shots in practice,  in games,  in his backyard before he gets that "one."  That same principle applies when it comes to approaching women.

You might approach dozens of women before you find that one that really takes your breath away.  The difference is,  if you are no longer insecure around women,  you will probably end up getting her.  That's the ultimate goal,  right?  To get that one woman that you never thought you could.  And it can happen as long as you immerse yourself and start putting yourself in situations that you struggle with.

DON'T LET YOUR INSECURITY KEEP YOU FROM GETTING THE GIRL -

No matter what,  you don't want to let any insecurities that you might have around women keep you from getting that girl that you really want.  How bad would it feel to know that she was there and all you had to do was walk up to her and talk to her,  and you couldn't do it?

That would have to be one of the worst feelings in the world.  The only way that you can rise up against your insecurities is to actually rise up.  You can't shirk away and just hope that they will go away.

It's one of those lessons that sometimes,  you really don't get it until you have an experience that 'forces' you to get it.  It's also one of the best ones that you can learn if you want to maintain your sanity.  You can't force a woman to like you and all of that time and energy that you might spend trying to make her feel that way... could be spent on something else like mingling with women who don't have to be forced to want to spend time with you.

Recently,  I was bringing up this point to a guy who was telling me about this woman he's had a crush on for a couple of years.  Digging deeper,  I found out that there were a couple of other women in his life that he thought might like him,  but for some reason he was stuck on that one who didn't feel that way.

I asked him if he thought the other women were good looking.  He said he did.

So,  I asked the obvious -  why was he wasting all of that time on that one he couldn't get,  when there were a couple that he probably could get and he thought they were good looking.

He gave me that look like a light bulb went off.

I saw him a little while after that... and he had made the move on one of the 'others' and he was dating her.

I asked him about the one he couldn't get and you know what?

He said he didn't care about that anymore.

There is a lesson there.

It's the last thing that you want to happen when you feel like you are in a good relationship.  Doing something that is going to kill a good thing is probably not high on your list of things to do,  yet sometimes,  you can do it without even realizing it.  If you are in a relationship right now and you are hoping that it is going to last,  it might be a good idea to become aware of some of the things that you can do that will potentially put you at risk for losing that good thing that you've got going.

Here are 5 almost guaranteed ways to kill a good relationship:

1 -  Getting jealous when guys flirt with her in front of you.

Dating a woman who looks good can be hard sometimes,  just because of the fact that you know other guys are going to think she is attractive.  That also usually means that some of them are going to flirt with her right in front of you and as much as you might hate that -  you can't let her see you get all jealous about it.  It's not like it is something that she can control,  if a guy wants to flirt with her,  he's probably going to do it.  What you have to keep in mind is that you are still the guy who is actually dating her and that guy who is flirting with your girlfriend probably wishes that he could be you.

2 -  Making her choose you over her friends.

There was this one woman that I dated for about a year and to be honest,  I couldn't really stand most of her friends.  They just were not the kind of people that I would hang out with on my own.  The only time I would be around those kind of people was when I was with her.  You know what,  though?  I didn't let her know it.  Most of the time,  if you try to make a woman choose between her friends and you,  you aren't going to like the results.  Even if she does end up choosing you,  that doesn't mean that she isn't going to harbor some animosity towards you for making her make that choice.  Just deal with it and know that at the end of the night,  it's her that you are going to be with anyway.

3 -  Telling her too much about previous relationships.

Women do usually want to know about your past relationships,  but that doesn't mean that they want to hear the whole story or hear about them too often.  Telling her what she needs to know when she wants to know it is one thing,  but revealing too much about previous relationships can end up being a relationship killer.  Even if it doesn't kill it outright,  it can make things seem tense and uncomfortable when the subject comes up and there is no real reason for that.

4 -  Talking negatively about her family.

You might think that her brother is a complete bore and her dad is just flat out annoying and that her sister sleeps around too much,  however,  you might also want to keep those things to yourself.  Bringing that kind of thing out into the open will usually just make things worse between you and her and there isn't much of an incentive to tell her how you really feel about her family.  Take it on the chin when you have to spend time with them if you don't care for them too much,  but don't make a point of telling her how you really feel if that is just going to end up being a negative discussion.

5 -  Cheating on her.

Of course this is one of those "duh" kind of statements,  but it still has to be said.  If there is one thing that can kill a relationship rather quickly,  it is cheating.  Just because you might have wandering eyes,  it doesn't mean that you need to act on anything and the moment that you do -  is the same moment that you might effectively be saying good bye to your girlfriend and destroying the relationship at the same time.  Keep it in your pants if you want the relationship to have a chance at lasting.

So what happens when you do screw things up and your relationship unravels and your girlfriend becomes your ex?

Check this site out:  http://geturgirl.com/index.php?p=1_6_Get-Your-Ex-Girl-Back where you can download a free guide on getting back your ex girlfriend.

This video has some good advice as well if you want to see things from a woman's perspective dealing with trust,  which can also end up killing a good relationship when there is a lack of trust.

It can be kind of hard to stop being this way if it is the way that you have been for a long time,  but if you really want to make women see you as an alpha male type,  you have to stop trying to be everything to everyone.  Being the kind of guy who will let people run all over him and take advantage of you is definitely not going to make women think of you as being an alpha male in the slightest.  It also probably doesn't feel that good if you tend to be that guy that gets taken advantage of.

There are plenty of women who will do that,  if they know that they can.

Let me tell you a story about Mark.

Mark is a good guy.  He wants people to like him and he is always quick to lend a helping hand.  Sometimes that means that he gets taken advantage of.  Mark goes out to a club one night and meets Mandy.  Mandy is pretty,  she knows how to come across as really sexy and alluring and Mark is smitten from the moment that he lays eyes on her.  She can tell right away just the kind of guy he is.  She flirts with him,  she leads him on.  He takes her home that night,  but not in the way that you are thinking.  He drives her back to her apartment and drops her off.  Doesn't even bother to go in for the kiss because he doesn't want her to think he is just trying to get her in bed or something.

Over the course of the next few weeks,  Mark is still smitten by Mandy.  He calls her up all of the time,  whenever she implies that she needs something,  he just happens to go out and buy it for her.  They spend a lot of time with one another,  but never really get physical.  She pecks him on the lips real quickly every now and again and that is all that it takes to keep Mark coming back for more.

Next thing you know,  Mark has spent a couple grand on Mandy and she is still not even his girlfriend.  He kind of thinks that she is,  but she is totally not.  They go out to a club together and Mark swears that they are going as a couple.  While they are there,  Mandy locks eyes with Travis.  Travis is a bad boy,  wouldn't spend a dime on her and is totally about trying to get her into bed.

Before the night is over,  Mandy is fooling around with Travis in the corner of the club.  Mark is standing against the wall,  still a little naive to what is actually going on.  Mandy comes back to him and tells him that she is going to stay and that he can go home if she wants to.  Finally,  Mark gets it.  He sees her run back over to Travis and he sees Travis palming her backside.  Mark goes home alone,  feeling like a loser,  his bank account near empty.

There are a lot of Marks out there and there definitely are a lot of Mandys.  You don't want to be a Mark and end up getting played like that.  It will happen,  though,  if you are the type that tries to be everything to everybody,  because women like Mandy can spot you from a mile away and they KNOW how to get what they want from you.